A person might have strengths or talents that aren’t obvious right away…

…especially if he’s being drowned out by someone barrelling over him. – Hana, Asterios Polyp

It has been a long time since I put my thoughts up here, so forgive me if I am a bit rusty. I also have quite a bit to get through, so let’s get started…

I am finally starting to settle into my new job. I have a weekly routine that helps keeps things ticking along quite smoothly, but it’s a routine that leaves me with little energy for creative pursuits during the week. One of the benefits of work, apart from the money, is the fact that I seem to be gaining weight. Yes, a very curious side effect which I feel is explained by the simple fact that it is quite a dull job. So, in my spare moments, I will grab a healthy snack of some variety to give me some stimulation. I am starting to connect with some of the people there which is also another reason the job is bearable.

I also recently had the great pleasure of attending a charity event called 1000 Drawings. It had a great concept. Get artists to donate art, sell it off, and donate the proceeds to charity. Add live music, good food, and of course, lots of alcohol and you have one legendary night ahead of you.

Unless of course it’s on a Thursday and you have work the next morning!

Despite the fact that I left at a very reasonable hour, I had a very cool time. Firstly, I got to bump into a lot of people I hadn’t seen in ages and catch up with them. The second, was the view (you know I’m not talking about just the art) which was splendid! And this was despite the fact that I am running around half blind (and that’s another story which shall be explained shortly). It also led me to the conclusion that there is no reason a straight, interesting and sexy guy such as myself should be single in this city. I just need to get out more.

So why am I running around half blind? Well, my glasses were broken by the monstrous wind that rampages through Cape Town in the area I just happen to work in. I was walking to work, minding my own business, when the wind kicked up. I bent my head downwards to shield my face from being blasted with dust, and the next thing I knew was that my normally clear vision had gone blurry. Yes, the wind had pulled my glasses right off my face. After searching with someone from work, a stranger eventually returned them, mangled beyond repair. So my new eyes should be arriving tomorrow after two weeks of running around squinting at things like a mole.

Now, the title of this piece is from a line of a graphic novel I recently finished called Asterios Polyp, and is relevant to the last topic I want to discuss. It’s a great piece which I recommend you get your hands on if you like graphic novels. But I am getting horribly sidetracked.

What I wanted to end with was the idea of confidence versus arrogance.

It is my belief that confidence is someone who is comfortable with just being. They don’t need to go on about their achievements, or their plans for life, or even talk much (it’s always been my belief that language is over-rated and anything that is actually important can be communicated without it). A friend of mine is of the opinion that it isn’t arrogant to talk about something you know you’re good at, and I mostly agree with him.

Another person who he spends time with felt that he was being arrogant. Firstly, I think that yes, maybe there is a degree of arrogance with stating that you are good at something. If you are good at something you shouldn’t have to state it. However, if someone is insecure and you inadvertedly come across as arrogant, that’s not really your fault.

I am going to be a bit of a hypocrit here and break a personal rule of mine and talk about my intelligence. I know I am smart (I was going to state how smart I was and then realised that I that would be arrogant) but I never talk about it. Unless someone asks I don’t talk about my academic background. Probably because I was smart enough to figure out how little work I had to do to get by and never did more than that. But in our sphere of friends, we were all intelligent people with what most people would consider to be highly successful academic backgrounds. For us it was business as usual. So when he would talk about his illustrious post-graduate academic career,  which from his point of view, wasn’t that big of a deal. For most people just getting their degrees was considered a major accomplishment, let alone taking their studies further.

So inadvertedly he came across as arrogant to this other person (or at least that’s the assumption I am working with).

It just left me thinking about how even a universally understood idea such as confidence is still entirely subjectively interpretted. The quote from Asterios Polyp reminded me particular of how I view my stengths, but how occassionally other people may not see them because they are so busy blowing their own horns, or that it takes them a while to notice what it is I am actually good at.

And with that I must bid you adieu, for I have work at an unreasonably godly hour and I must get the absolute bare minimum of beauty sleep.

Art and life

Life is happening, and as a result, not much art is.

I’m still adjusting to my new lifestyle, and it means that I’m pretty tired by the end of the day. I just want to come home and relax, other than a bit of doodling and a lot of reading.Life is happening, and as a result, not much art is. I’m still adjusting to my new lifestyle, and it means that I’m pretty tired by the end of the day. I just want to come home and relax, other than a bit of doodling and a lot of reading.

On the subject of reading, I have been doing a lot of reading on Buddhism. After dabbling with it briefly, I find myself being drawn back to a more “Buddhist” view of the world. I say “Buddhist” because as with everything in life, I take bits and pieces from lots of places and mish mash it all together (as anyone who knows me, that’s pretty much me in a nutshell). It’s just that I agree with a lot of Buddhist philosophies, so my spiritual guidance seems to be coming mostly from there.

Otherwise, taking things one day at a time

Time marches on…

So I survived my first week at my new job as a technical writer. It’s been pretty interesting so far, in regards to the actual work. The training itself is boring and mundane and as always I learn best from doing, not from sitting in a lecture taking notes.

It’s been a bit tough adjusting to the different sleep schedule, but I’m slowly getting used to it.

Art wise I am working on something for someone as a personal project, and one of my neighbours has mentioned that he might be interested in comissioning me for a mural. I haven’t had a chance to talk to him yet about the details, but I’m sure he’ll let me know once he’s figured out what he wants. I have started a piece of spiritual writing entitled “Kaizen – My chronicle in the search for enlightenment (or God)”. Kaizen is a japanese word for self improvement. The writing is a bit personal, but I am considering taking extracts from it and putting it up here from time to time. I will see how things go. I have been reading a lot of spiritual guidance books, and am exploring the ideas that are discussed in them in relevance to my own life.

I was hoping that with the start of my new job I would have more time for my art and writing, and while I am definately playing less video games, I am not getting as much drawing and writing in as I would like. Riding the train in the mornings is what I refer to as the “sardine rush” means that I don’t have much room to breath, let alone draw or write as I had hoped. A friend and neighbour has spoken to me about doing a mural, so I hope that he can decide what he wants so I can start on it soon.

I am however, getting a lot of reading done so I am not feeling creatively deprived. Part of the reason that I am doing a lot of spiritual reading is because of the book The Monk who sold his Ferrari by Robert Sharma. I was working at the bookstore a few years back when it was incredibly popular, but being me meant that I avoided it like the plague. It’s too bad because it’s actually a very well written book. It manages to explore philosophical and spiritual ideas in a way that is accessible to anyone. I am also reading The Little Prince as well as some Osho and Tolle.

So, while I don’t have the time to update twice a week, which would be ideal, I will still be keeping people posted at my old regular pace of once to week.

Plan B? We have a Plan B?

With my freedom on the line, and time running out before I begin the nine to five grind of the typical wage slave, I made plans for Friday night. Unfortunately those plans did not work out, leaving me wondering what I could possibly do to fill the time.

Thankfully, I had a Plan B (well, my friends did anyway).

Pizzas at Baroosos (Da Vincis still makes a better pizza) was followed by a rush home to get on a decent shirt and shoes, since we were apparently going to visit some art galleries in Long Street.  If I had known the main reason to go to the galleries was the free beer and wine, I wouldn’t have bothered to change.

It was still worthwhile seeing the various levels of art getting sold, which really did serve to highlight the only reason I was not making any money on my art, was simply because it was not framed. While I do agree that some art may not speak to all people, the same way some authors may not appeal to all readers, I appreciate someone who has a decent level of “technical” skill.

After perusing the various photography and paintings, we decided to head to the Centre of the Book. An interesting place that felt like it was probably once a slave auction house, tonight it was the stage for several music acts. The first of which, while having an incredible vocalist, was nothing new for me. Reminding me of the japanese group M-Flo, they mixed a jazzy sound with hip hop. They were good but didn’t blow me away.

The second act was an Ndebele (am I spelling that right?) rock group which was a cool act to watch. It had two girls shaking what their mommas gave them, and an old African lady taking center stage with some awesome riffs on her guitar. Needless to say, you haven’t lived unless you’ve seen an old black lady pulling off moves that match the American Gods of Rock.

The final act was a group of African American guys called Hypnotic Bass. As you can tell by the fact that I actually remembered their name, they were without a doubt, the finest act of the evening. They were an interesting mix of marching band and hip hop. What put them miles ahead of the rest of the acts was the fact that they got the chairs taken out, which gave people room to actually move! (Dancing to music! What a brilliant idea!) It took a while for everyone to warm up to them, but by the end they had everyone dancing and singing along.

So despite the fact that my original plans for tonight fell through, and my old cowboy hat did not get to grace the streets of Cape Town with it’s presence, I still managed to have an unexpectedly awesome time. With time running short, I plan to do the same with the rest of my weekend!

There is a bit of a contradiction in this post in that while it seems to proclaim that I will have less of a life after starting work, I actually believe the opposite to be true. In order to have an active social life, one needs money, something I have been very short of the past few months. With a steady income, I will finally be able to take part in all the stuff I have been avoiding due to the fact that it simply cost too much.

I canna do it Cap’n! I don’t have the power!

I’m really busy working on two personal projects that need to be done post haste, hence my missing the Wednesday deadline… Will do a decent update on Sunday.

Yes, I know this doesn’t really count as a post but it’s all the time I have!

Spring, that time of year when a young man’s fancy turns to love…

…and I finally get a job, after months and months of searching!

I have landed a full time position at an IT company as a technical writer, which means writing manuals, books, faq’s etc. It’s not the rock star lifestyle I was hoping for but there definitely seem to be some cool people working there, and I get to earn some decent money while pursuing my creative writing and illustration in my own time. It also means I am again financially stable and can (finally) start paying back my parents.

In the artistic headlines I was sitting enjoying a nice long soak in the bath today (I can imagine I won’t be having too many of these in the near future) when an idea for a children’s book hit me, along the same lines as Shaun Tan’s work in The Red Tree. Instead of blabbing on too much about it, here is a VERY quick sketch.

The story is about a young Prince who lives in a massive fortress (not a castle, this place is designed for war) on his own. This fortress is surrounded by monsters and all sorts of nasty things, which are kept out by the massive walls and traps. One day he sees something that catches his eye. It turns out to be a young girl. She comes day after day and watches the Prince.  But the Prince is too afraid, even though he is slowly falling in love with her.

She disappears one day and the little Prince, having now fallen for her, decides to risk leaving his lonely sanctuary to journey out and find her. The story follows his journey from his fortress and all the myriad of nasty and not-so-nasty, creatures and people he meets.

Hopefully I will actually manage to finish this, as opposed to it just sitting as an Awesome (TM) concept on my proverbial drawing board!

36 hours and counting down…

I find myself in the position of having made impulsive agreement with a friend and fellow writer. It reminds me of the way my mother used to tell me to eat my vegetables.  Even though I know it’s a good thing for me, there will be undoubtedly be times where I will wish I didn’t have to. We have agreed that in our aspirations towards literary greatness, we will update our blogs twice a week. A mid week update on a Wednesday, and an end of week update on a (gasp) Sunday. Failure to meet these deadlines will result in a heavy financial penalty! Which brings me to my current dilemma…

No, not where am I going to find the money!

What am I going to write about? I generally sit on ideas for ages before actually writing about them. I let them simmer on low heat for hours to bring out the flavour. A great idea, like a great wine, needs time!

Then this idea came to mind:

Find a core group of people to work with, to keep you motivated, to keep you going – Bobby Chiu

I was recently listening to one of Bobby’s latest podcasts, and he talks about finding people with the same passions as you. So what are the passions that I should look for in other people? The answer to that, as always, lies within.

My first passion is writing.

As I have mentioned before, writing is something that I have been doing for most of my life. Whether it is due to my highly introverted nature, or because I was blessed with a gift, I do tend to have a way with words. One of the things that bothers me is when people say that you need to practice writing for it to improve. I don’t know how other people write, but for me it comes from a “voice” inside me, and this voice knows how to speak! Apart from, maybe some re-wording, or fine tuning of the rhythm, I find the idea of improving your writing as a first language speaker very absurd. Perhaps as someone learning a “language”, whether it’s the language of words, or language of music, or the language of painting, then yes, it’s applicable. But for anyone who has been speaking and writing a language for the majority of their life, I find the idea that practicing using a tool you use everyday, a bit odd.

My other passion is art.

My art is a long term goal. I paint and draw digitally since it’s far more forgiving than traditional media, and it suits my style perfectly. My style of drawing is more like the method used by painters in that I start with a very basic, very rough idea, and then build it up. Photoshop is naturally geared towards this and so I am able to produce some finished art, which when with traditional tools, I usually get frustrated by the mistakes I make and end up scrapping it half way through!

Despite having a medium that suits my method of creation, my art still has a long way to go. I remember how I used to plateau so much with my drawing, and how it would frustrate me endlessly! I realise now that I wasn’t really leveling out in terms of skill. Rather like the changes that happen within myself, my development is so gradual that unless I am on the outside looking in,  I wouldn’t see it. Thankfully I have kept a lot of my work, and am now able to plot my progress from as far back as three years ago, and it amazes me how far I have come. Perhaps after another twenty years of speaking the language of art, I will no longer need to “practice” it.

And so I return to my original quote by Bobby Chiu, “Find a core group of people to work with, to keep you motivated, to keep you going.“

Sadly I meet very few people who are passionate about the things I am passionate about. Finding these people in person, for someone who is not at art school or in a studio, is a difficult task to say the least. I have had to reach out across time and space to connect with people who have the same passions I have, which thankfully is possible with the internet.  It’s been an invaluable tool in bringing me in touch with people, sadly most of which I will probably never meet face to face, who love the same things I do.

This connection, as faint as it is, reminds me of what I have to do.

It keeps me motivated and gives me hope that I will one day reach my dream.

If by some miraculous chance you are from Cape Town and love the same things I do, then drop me a line (either on DeviantArt or Facebook). I am trying to find people who are interested in starting an “artists” meet up. Like the Subway Sketching group that Bobby Chiu started, it’s just some time where people who love either to write and draw can get together and actually do what they love with other people who love it just as much.

I’d also like to take a moment to thank Mr. Keith Moore for being, at least partly, responsible for this latest post. He has recently started his blog, recording his side splitting journey towards being ready for the next London Marathon. Check it out at http://nonstarter.wordpress.com/

Remember who you are.

This piece has changed quite radically since it’s original conception. It was originally going to be a piece on the self. Then it was going to be on history. Love somehow became a big part of it somewhere along the line. The final product seems to be a concoction of all three.

I remember calling a friend of mine who was overseas in Europe. He was using his laptop with speakers and a built in mic, so needless to say our conversation was going to be heard by any other people present in the room. We were talking when a female acquaintance of his popped in and heard us.

“Your friend sounds like a foreigner.”

“Yeah I get that a lot.” I replied.  She didn’t realise that I could hear what she was saying so I guess she must have been a bit surprised. “But if you think that’s odd you’re going to be really surprised when you find out I’m Indian.”

I have lost count of the amount of times I have been asked what part of the UK I am from, or how long did I stay in the US. I even have had one girl ask me if I was a Mauritian prince because I looked like I came from Mauritius, but I sounded like I was British royalty (I often kick myself for not taking full advantage of that situation).

I am of Indian descent but am incredibly disconnected from almost everything to do with the Indian community. I remember growing up and being incredibly frustrated with having to do things I really was not interested in doing. I was forced to try and connect with a community that had nothing to offer me as an individual. As a teenager, I did everything in my power to reject that part of myself. A rebellious cultural amputation is probably the best way to describe it. I did eventually manage to find my own path and space which had very little to do with my Indian heritage. Despite this I cannot ignore that no matter how I may sometimes feel disconnected to my Indian heritage, it is a part of me. It has, in some way, shaped me into the person I am today. I was reminded of this very fact a few days ago.

I was woken up on  Sunday morning at 6.30 am (I would normally not be up at that ungodly hour) to visit an ill family member in hospital. Despite my lack of connection to my community, I am not a cold hearted bastard and came along willingly. After our visit to the hospital we went to have lunch with the rest of the family, which turned out to be more than a pleasant experience.

We were all seated around the table after lunch, and the topic somehow got onto how the various older couples had met and gotten together. The stories that these people have were fantastic! It really highlighted how people today have love way too easy! Or maybe the trials that these people endured pushed the relationships to the point where they either broke, or were forged to withstand the test of time. My father, who I have never had the best relationship with, went through a lot to get my mother to South Africa! If he hadn’t done the things he did, these words would not be here. Another Indian husband told us the story of how he hid his British wife from the police.

While we were sitting and listening to this generation reminisce, my sister and I both had this same thought. There are these incredible love stories that are waiting to be told, and if there is any topic that anyone can empathise with, it’s the trials and hardships we endure for love. Is there anyone out there who is trying to tell them?

For the first time in my life I realised that despite my apparent lack of association with  my Indian culture, I am, even if it’s just in a small way, able to connect to it.

As to the reasons why I was disconnected… I thought about it for a while. A large degree of why I was not connected to my community was because I was sheltered from apartheid. My parents made tremendous sacrifices to ensure that I went to a private school, which meant I spent most of my time amongst middle to upper class white kids. Obviously this meant my development was more in line of a white kid from Scottsville, than an indian kid from Raisethorpe. As a result I couldn’t really empathise with the way the Indian community saw things. I mean, 1994 came and went, and my life went on as per usual. It was the end of Apartheid? I actually wondered what the big deal was.

Maybe as a child I was too young to realise how history had shaped me, and time was what I needed to come to this conclusion:

The culture of my family may be a part of myself that I barely know, and am glad that I have at least some time to get to know it better.

Movin’ on Up

My anticipation for Up, the latest Pixar production, has been much greater than usual. Living in the third world means we get (somewhat) screwed over when it comes to movie release dates. I must admit that Ster-Kinekor is usually good at releasing Pixar movies on time, but I guess since Up is the first 3D Pixar release, us South Africans had to wait three whole months longer to see it.

But the wait is over, and I am so glad I didn’t download a shaky cam copy off the internet! (Don’t judge me, three months is a long time!)

Up is the story of 70 year old Carl Frederickson, who has dreamt his whole life of following in the footsteps of his childhood idol, explorer extraordinaire, Charles Munz. Before he is forced into a retirement home, he hatches up a plan to realise his dream. Being a balloon salesman his entire life, he puts his wares to good use and  soon he (and his house) are on their way.

Soon after lift off however, Carl discovers that he has an extra passenger, a young boy scout by the name of Russell.  After getting sucked into a raging  storm Carl finds that they are close to the mythical Paradise Falls, a place that Munz spoke of before he was shunned by the exploring community. After losing a lot of ballast, Carl decides to get to the Falls on foot, with Russell and house in tow. On their way they meet an eccentric bunch of characters, including a colourful roadrunner, who Russell names Kevin, and a talking dog called Douglas. Carl also gets an unexpected bonus to his dream, but is it really what he imagined it to be?

Pixar can do no wrong.

Wait, I lie, Cars was less than stellar in my opinion. It wasn’t bad. It was just completely predictable and is without a doubt Pixar’s weakest release.

Up, on the other hand, is simply fantastic. Pixar demonstrates their mastery of the animation medium and stellar storytelling skills by managing to evoke tears through a simple montage sequence right at the start of the movie.  It’s also in 3D which is a bonus, although it’s just part of the hook. Like Monsters vs Aliens they use a lot of 3D at the start to get your interest then cut back as the movie progresses. Up isn’t perfect however and as good as the story is, even I must admit it does get a bit “cartoony” (considering this is a story about a man with a flying house) in the second half. It’s a minor flaw and one that you don’t even really notice.

Up is sad and sweet and funny and will no doubt get multiple viewings from me!

P.S. For some reason we didn’t get the animated short Partly Cloudly with the pre-screening of Up. When it’s officially released I’ll go see if they screen it.

That would make a happy ending as easy to fake as an orgasm.

Having a bit of a bonus this month, I caved and bought a graphic novel I knew nothing about.  Faker is written by Mike Carey, illustrated by Jock, and published by Vertigo. It’s a self contained story, so it’s just a single volume so at least you don’t have to waste too much time on it.

The story follows a ragtag group of friends who have just arrived back at University. Jessie, a sexy blonde blackmailer, Paul, the resident jock, Yvonne, who likes to hack while she depilates, and Marky, the resident manwhore, are all best friends with Nick. Nick is a great guy, but Nick has a huge problem. Only his friends remember him!

The level of the art in this book is pretty good. I wouldn’t say it’s fantastic, but it definitely suits the story and the style is consistent. Nothing annoys me more than having one page of totally awesome art followed by several pages of total crap. The strongest part of this book however is the story. It has a great start that has a lot of questions which the reader obviously wants to know the answers to. I found myself completely absorbed by the first half of the book.

The second half of the story takes a dive as it begins to reveal the answers and for me it’s the weakest part of the story. Why can’t you just leave the mystery alone? In my opinion, it’s always better to leave at least something up to the imagination of the reader. The writer demonstrates this with the ending. It works and the result is a very strong conclusion. Unfortunately you are also left wondering about some of the characters. They seemed to have been put in only to allow a comment to be made or to prove a point and as a result we don’t really care what happens to them. They could have easily been cut without affecting the overall story.

So overall I am somewhat underwhelmed. The blurb on the back is definitely great as it convinced (suckered) me into buying the book. As far as the rest of the book goes, I must admit that it is unfortunately decidedly average.